


within and without

by januarys



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-16
Updated: 2013-03-16
Packaged: 2017-12-05 11:47:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/722935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/januarys/pseuds/januarys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ME3. When he’s with Shepard, Kaidan loses his words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	within and without

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, I finally went there-ish! What can I say? Kaidan is my favourite and so ridiculously in love with Shepard (in all the ways) and hell, I just wanted some preciousness between these two dorks. This is fluffy so if you're into that sort of thing then JUMP RIGHT IN. Also, creative license *waves around* taken for certain parts. I guess. Yep. I do hope you like it <3

Within the confines of the cabin, Kaidan watches John in his slumber.

It’s the rise and fall of his spine, the dim light from the aquarium casting long shadows along the endless plane of his back, the smooth surface of John’s skin occasionally marred by weathered scars. Kaidan’s eyes find John’s face, peaceful in his slumber, and he shifts closer to him.

John is incredibly warm. Kaidan wants to lose himself in him.

He leans in closer to the impossibility lying next to him, tries to think of how easy it was to slip into this _thing_ they have now. It was new at first, and Kaidan wasn’t even sure it was the right thing to do. With the galaxy raging across the stars and all eyes on _Commander Shepard’s_ next move, well, maybe it would have been better to leave it as a simply fantasy, an idea to chase around during downtime—

Yet all it took was a sanity check, all of Kaidan’s stumbling phrases, John’s familiar warm smile and ‘ _after all this time_ ’ and Kaidan knew that it was right, it was right.

He takes time to just _look_ at John, sometimes in disbelief because this is real, so real, and sometimes he’s been caught out. It’s hard to find words for John, though, because it’s easy to get lost in the depths of his impossibly blue eyes and his crooked grin and _John._

Words are non-existent, meaningless at times. Kaidan’s words are always forgotten when John presses him against the wall, hands cradling his jaw, his kiss taking those phrases from Kaidan’s tongue. Those words are reduced to breathless sighs when John lets his mouth travel down his body, his tongue feathering the sensitive skin on Kaidan’s hips.

Words are impossible with John.

His hand rests gently on John’s shoulder, thumb brushing the soft skin beneath the blade. John stirs, but doesn’t awaken. Kaidan lets his hand drift downwards, slowly, fingers leaving phantoms along the other man’s skin, brushing softly against the implant in the base of his skull.

John groans softly, the vibrations dance against Kaidan’s fingertips, and he blearily opens his eyes to look at Kaidan from over his shoulder.

“How the hell are you awake before me?” He says, voice rough from sleep. John turns back to the pillow and buries his face into its softness.

Kaidan holds back the chuckle and decides not to answer, not to use words for this moment. His hand runs down John’s back, fingers leaving more pressure in their wake, and traces patterns into his skin. John relaxes slightly into Kaidan’s touch, and he breathes.

His fingers dance around a freckle at the base of his spine, his palm smoothing over the jagged scar left from Akuze on his waist, his knuckles brushing against a burn mark from Virmire on his right shoulder and John stiffens slightly.

Kaidan pulls himself closer to John, to his ridiculously warm skin, and presses his forehead just above the scorch, slightly rosier than the rest of him. His free hand finds one of Johns and their fingers link easily. John relaxes once again.

A beat passes. Two. Kaidan brushes his lips against the skin. Three.

John moves, and Kaidan is suddenly pinned beneath the other man. The aquarium light throws sharp shadows along his face, his impossibly blue eyes, and he wants to remember _this_ — John’s face inches from his own, their calloused fingers intertwined, limbs locked beneath tangled sheets— before the other man closes the distance to rest their foreheads together, free hand holding Kaidan’s jaw softly.

There’s that split second that Kaidan simply forgets about everything outside this moment, forgets about everything that led to this endless second where the only thing he knows is John, John, _John—_

John meets him with a kiss, a sigh, and Kaidan loses his words once again.


End file.
